I 'Just Do It' Dizzy

The other day I saw this Nike swoosh symbol made out of Lego. Well Nike - I hope you don't mind, but I've kinda adopted it as my own. This swoosh looks like it's dizzy!

Deep down, I've probably always been a Nike girl at heart. It's not that I particularly susbscribe to big brand loyalty. It's not that I was even sold on their overpriced merchandise. What got me, were the three little words in their slogan. Those three words completely changed me. 

"Just Do It" not only had a profound effect on me, but it also revolutionalized a generation. It made average people try to be a little above average and it made ordinary people believe they could do extraordinary things.

It was partly this slogan, that got a couch potato like me, up and off my couch to start running on the day of my 40th birthday. It was partly this slogan that was behind my decision to run the Nike Women's Marathon, years later in San Francisco. And if you don't believe that this is a big deal, just think about how many hills there are in San Francisco!

Nike Women's Marathon with friends.

A shorter, less hilly race.

And it was partly this slogan that helped me overcome my fear of heights and attempt tree top trekking with my family.

"Just Do It" Scared!!!

"Just Do It" is a great slogan...until of course - you can't!

What happens when you can no longer "Just Do It"? What happens when an accident, an injury, or an illness prevents you from doing what you want to do? What then?

Well, that's when you have to make some changes and modifications. That's when you have to adapt the slogan to fit your particular situation. That's when you learn that you can still do some of the things you used to enjoy, just differently.  That's when - You 'Just Do It' Dizzy!

When I was first hit with Vestibular Neuritis, I avoided anything and everything that made me dizzy. For the first few months I literally curled up into a ball, stopped moving and stopped living. I didn't do anything and I didn't go anywhere. I was so depressed and I couldn't see a way out of it. I just couldn't visualize living the rest of my life with dizziness. But slowly, with time and VRT, I began to realize that movement, although it made me dizzy, was actually helping to improve my dizziness and imbalance. 

I recently read a post by Lauren Wootten, The Vertigo Therapist, who describes this process perfectly.

Lauren says "In *many* (but not all) vestibular conditions, the most effective way to decrease your dizziness symptoms is to actually make yourself dizzy. It seems counter-intuitive, and is often the opposite of what you have been doing. You come up with all kinds of strategies to avoid the movements and things that will make you dizzy".

She goes on to say "As soon as you start exposing yourself on a regular basis (in proper dosage and situation) to the things that make you dizzy, your brain does an amazing thing called 'HABITUATION'. Your brain starts to rewire itself to ignore that dizzy message, as it's no longer a useful signal. You are effectively desensitizing yourself from the dizzying movement or activity, allowing you to once again move more normally and get back to doing the things you want to do".

Lauren also states clearly that "Habituation is best suited to people who get dizzy with movement and activity and is not suited to people who have spontaneous or constant dizziness or room spinning vertigo".

What makes you dizzy, can be good for you, in incremental doses!

So now I'm trying to expose myself a little more to the things that make me dizzy.

My husband is a pilot we have a small plane. We used fly together a lot, but my vestibular disorder changed all that. I tried flying with him once before but pretty much kept my eyes closed the entire time. 

Yesterday, I took my new Nike slogan and decided to go flying with him, knowing that in all likelihood, I would get dizzy doing it. 

I took some anti nausea medication and a travel sickness bag (just in case) and we took off, And this time, I kept my eyes open.

Ready for take-off!

The view from here...propeller and all.

Almost touching the clouds.

Downtown Toronto.

Eyes on the propeller during the landing.

                                                            

Dizziness is my life now. So it would seem that I have two choices:- I can either stop living altogether, or I try to live the best I possibly can with this dizziness.

Now, please don't think for a minute that I'm encouraging anyone to take risks while dizzy. You cannot, nor should you ever - drive, operate machinery, climb a ladder or do any potentially dangerous activities such as down-hill skiing, while you are dizzy. But you can try to adapt some of the activities you once enjoyed or find some new ones. 

I can no longer run a marathon, but I can do a slow 5km run/walk. I can't do a full Zumba class, but I can do most of the moves if I omit the quick turns in the faster routines and just march on the spot.

I didn't choose to be dizzy, but here I am. So I might as well make the best of it. There are days when my symptoms prevent me from doing anything much at all. But when I am able - whatever I have to do, I 'Just Do It' Dizzy!

My 'Extra Mile' Friend

I used to believe  this quote wholeheartedly - that friendships would fall into one of the above three categories. But chronic illness changed all that. Some of the friends who I thought would be there for a lifetime, turned out instead to be there for a reason or a season. And vice versa.

One of the recurring themes within the chronic illness community is the sadness that comes from the loss of a friendship. A vestibular disorder can put a real strain on a friendship. Even a lifetime friendship.

A poem I wrote about changing friendships.

I have a friend who doesn't fall into just one friendship category - she actually falls into all three. My friend, Elizabeth. She is a season, reason and lifetime friend.

 I first met Elizabeth in 2008 when I joined a running group. We run at the same speed, so ended up in the same runners pace group.  We are also 'boy moms' who have sons that are approximately the same age. Elizabeth and I used to run many many miles together during marathon training and subsequently completed a lot of road races together. So over the years, we have spent a lot of time talking together. All of my very best running memories are with Elizabeth.

Niagara Falls International Marathon

Scotiabank Toronto Waterfront Marathon

The Egg-Nog Jog.

The Santa Shuffle

A race with our boys.

Once I became ill, the terms of our friendship changed. The balance shifted from a mutual 50/50 give and take relationship, to one where I was receiving more than I was able to give.  Now unable to run, I assumed that our friendship would eventually fade and die over time, as it did with most of the others in our running group - since we no longer had a shared interest of running. But I'm happy to say in this case, I was wrong.

The very first time I had to cancel plans at the last minute because of the way I was feeling, this what  Elizabeth did....

Delicious. Thank you. 

She called my husband and told him not to worry about dinner that night, and she then showed up on my doorstep with a cooler and a prepared dinner for my whole family.

She faithfully contacts me to initiate a get together. Often it's a walk, but sometimes it's coffee. And then there are days where we don't really do anything at all.

A walk in the woods.

What used to be our long marathon training runs have now become long walks instead. We walk and we talk.  Elizabeth is a great listener and always helps me to see that although things may seem dark, there is still a brighter side of life. And on the days when life feels overwhelming, she distracts me with her wonderful life stories. Although we can no longer run for miles and miles at a time like we used to in our running days,  Elizabeth never fails to go the extra mile for me. I call her my 'extra mile' friend. She is very special.

There is no way I could repay her for all the little things she's done, but I've often wondered how I could show my appreciation for her. Then yesterday, thanks to VeDA, I knew exactly what I could do....

VeDA has an appreciation award, for family or friends who've extended themselves  and who have really helped someone on their vestibular journey. It's called the OWL award, which means 'One Who Listens'. 

I've decided to nominate Elizabeth, my extra mile friend, for the OWL award. I hope she wins - she really deserves it. 

Also, a shoutout to some other lifetime friends, who've gone the extra mile (and beyond) for me as I've adjusted and learned to live with my vestibular disorder....Nicky, Weny, Katy, Catrina, Taina, and Anna Marie. Thank you.

Do you have a friend, who has gone the extra mile for you? Perhaps you could nominate them for the OWL award?